Drive In '77

Goon

A few weeks back I got an email from Gongshow Gear, a clothing company dedicated to funny hockey inspired shirts and hats etc.  It announced the coming of apparel for a new movie called Goon.  I liked the hats and sought out the film's website.  It took all of 10 seconds of the trailer to know I couldn't wait to see it.  A) I'm a hockey nut, and B) it looked funny as hell.  Both things remain true.

Seann William Scott plays Doug "The Thug" Glatt, a simpleton bouncer struggling with his place amongst a successful family of doctors.  His life is definitely stalled out until his best friend Ryan (Jay Baruchel) takes him to a local minor league hockey game where he beats the living crap out of a player that jumps the boards to come after Ryan.  The local coach takes note and even though Doug literally cannot skate, he makes the team for one reason and one reason only, to fight.

For those not into hockey, the roll on a team of a "goon," more commonly known as an "enforcer," has been a part of the sport for as long as most can remember.  Players would police themselves so to speak.  If one team targeted a star player or there were some cheap shots going around, you'd see the respective enforcers take the ice and drop the gloves.  Despite the brutality at its core, this type of fighting was agreed upon and approached by the combatants with a sense of nobility.

That is one of the things Goon got right.  Scott's performance is so great because he displays that pride while, as the poster says, he is the nicest guy you'll ever fight.  He thanks his opponents, takes care of his teammates and his courtship of Eva (Alison Pill) is too adorable for her to resist.  I called him a simpleton, but he's more than that, he's just a good guy lost.  You can recognize, and maybe empathise with Doug as a human being looking for his place in the world.  He might not be proud of his calling, but he's proud to be useful.  He's proud to be part of a team.  It's a message that rings loud in today's economy and shifts Goon from a simple hockey/sports film into the story of a working class hero.

Of course, all that is the film school version of my review.  The reality for most will be to sit down and watch a very funny movie from the guy behind Superbad.  Doug's journey starts in the minor league's minor league and sees him rise up to eventually square off with one of the greatest fighters of all time.  He finds romance and becomes the emotional leader of his team and yes, scores a goal with his butt.  

Now, I'm not so blinded by my undying affection for hockey that I fail to recognize the flaws.  Firstly, writer/actor Baruchel is hard to watch.  I get it, he's a scrawny, super minor league hockey fan with a potty mouth, but he cusses so much you just want him to shut up.  He plays it way over the top, too much so, ignoring basic rules of decorum in every situation and while Doug might admit he's dumb, Ryan is clearly the biggest idiot of the bunch.  His character has no arc, and really, after the first reel no purpose in the film.  Even his "let's cheer my buddy up" speech ends in a swear word tirade and "let's get drunk!"  He's a caricature, I get that, but I found him too annoying and eating up too much screen time.

My super nitpick comes from me as a goalie and representing the brotherhood of goaltenders.  How in the hell do you have a locker room full of hockey players, hockey fans and Canadians of all things, and yet the guy playing the back up goalie sitting next to Doug and prominently in the frame is putting his goalie pads on the wrong legs!!  Seriously?  You should all have your maple leaf tattoos removed.

My biggest complaint though comes as a devoted ambassador of the game.  As a coach, a player and a fan, I've been battling the bloated public perception that our game is nothing more than a series of fights punctuated with some goals.  I've seen the "give blood, play hockey" bumper stickers and the images of guys with missing teeth while slouched shit faced in a pile of beer cans.  They are stereotypes and while there are segments of our game that even to this day embrace that image, the reality is entirely different.  I hope that people understand the hyperbole of Goon and enjoy it for that silliness and not as a historical record of minor league hockey.

The movie also faces quite a battle in that, considering the wave of anti-fighting and concussion awareness that has swept over the NHL recently, as well as most major sport, a movie that glorifies the goon stereotype will get no play with the big league.  This isn't Miracle or Mystery, Alaska.  too much of the feel good of Goon is squeezed out by the pure brutality of the fight sequences.  This is an adult hockey player film, not a youth hockey player film.

With all that said, I really like the movie.  Flawed, yes, but highly enjoyable.  Scott is very funny and likable, as are his teammates.  You wanna cheer for these guys and when the final fight arrives, they've established there will be no real loser.  Both men honor their trade and both men achieve success in what they set out to accomplish.  It's a win win!  Goon won't dethrone Slap Shot as the funniest hockey movie ever, but it is a worthy assistant captain.  

Grade: B+

Fav. Quote:  "Why are you crying?  Did you just watch Rudy?"

Hockey Hump Day: Dropping the Puck

Opening face-offs for the 2011-12 are tomorrow!!!!  I am so ready for another hockey season to begin.  Some years I'm a slow starter, waiting till maybe December before I really get into it, but this year I've spent all summer doing more research on prospects and roster moves than I have in a decade probably.  I have also started up my own fantasy hockey league!  Instead of playing with strangers, I set up my own on Yahoo! and invited a ton of people.  I ended up with 8 teams, which is good.  Would've liked 12, but people are lazy/busy.  I'm going to get a little trophy for the champ and hopefully make this a regular thing.  And I must admit, I got a really good team!  Let's just say my defense right now is Dan Boyle, P.K. Subban, Shea Weber, and Chris Pronger.  Boom.

So, has anyone heard what's going down with the New York Islanders goalie situation yet?  I was scouring their site and the Yahoo! NYI page earlier, but I can't find any announcements on which two keepers they are starting the season with.  The rundown is former University of Michigan standout Al Montoya who performed very well for the Islanders last season, reluctant waiver victim Evgeni Nabokov, and super contract holder porcelain doll Rick DiPietro.  All three deserve to be in the league and with Nabby finally in camp, the Isles need to make some decisions.  So what are they?  It looks like they might roll all three!  That's not really great for any of them, but considering how fragile DiPietro has been (a real shame because he is a super talented goaltender) they seem to be covering their bases.  But they'll have to move Nabby before the trade deadline or lose him to UFA, which means they need to play him to entice teams and remind them of his skill level.  If I had to bet, Montoya will get the short end of the stick early on.  Any way you slice it, Newsday had this great quote from DiPietro, "I've been here with four on the roster," he said. "Nothing changes my approach, unless I'm rehabbing an injury. There's only two things you can control: How well you prepare and how cool your equipment looks."  And Rick does always seem to have some cool looking gear!

Keeping it in New York, I just read that Sean Avery has cleared waivers for the Rangers.  No doubt he will be loaned out to a European club or sent down to the Connecticut Whale in the AHL.  Either way, they move his salary off their cap which could see the Rangers more active come the trade deadline as they pump up the roster around Brad Richards for a playoff run.  I would think Rangers fans would be happy about losing Avery, who has always been more of a circus act than a quality hockey player.  Sure he had some productive season, but his antics overtook his work ethic and his attitude has become a burden on the league.  Hence, no takers on the waiver wire for Sean.  Avery appeared to care more about dating celebrities and trying to position himself as some sort of hockey version of David Beckham than playing hockey.  The difference being, despite your opinion on soccer in general, is that Beckham is a hard worker who contributes to teams.  Avery became a clown.  To his credit, it bought him some time in the league, but you have to wonder how much more time, quality time, he could've had if he just buried his head and worked hard.  And didn't sucker punch so many goaltenders....

Finally today, a little update on my Drew Doughty comments from last week.  Drew got his deal, the Kings caved and gave him a long term contract for $7 million a season.  That makes Doughty the third highest paid defenseman in the game, behind only Shea Weber and Brian Campbell.  Which of course brings me to the idea that Brian Campbell is waaaay more overpaid than Doughty!  Good for Drew, he didn't flinch.  Boo on the Kings, they did.  Not only did they flinch, they waited until the plane was leaving for their Euro opener to do it!  Why?  They wasted all that time, kept Doughty practicing with a junior team and not with his teammates for what?  The answer is nothing.  If they could find the money now, they could've found it in August.  On this deal, the Kings get a big fat FAIL.

Alrighty then!  Let's get this season started!!!  I can almost smell the eternal hope of a Sharks v. Flyers finals.  It is closely followed by the bitter scent of disappointment;)  Have a great season everyone!!

Hockey Hump Day: Doughty & Bail Bonds

As part of my new approach to Drive In '77, making it more personal, I will be blogging about the NHL and hockey in general every Wednesday.  So let's drop the puck!!

Doughty Face

As much as we like to talk about free agent signings and trades, the drama behind hold outs is even more enticing.  This season it is all about the Los Angeles Kings and Drew Doughty.  Reports vary, but essentially Dean Lombardi and the Kings are offering him a long term contract that averages about $6.8 million a year.  This would put him as the 4th highest paid D-man in the league and on par with Anze Kopitar as the highest contract in team history.  Doughty apparently wants upwards of $7 million instead and is working out with a junior team in London, Ont.  I've seen London and I've seen the toyota Sports complex where the Kings practice.  I'm gonna have to go L.A. on this one!

The thing is, and I expect to get flamed by King fans everywhere for this, that Doughty, as talented and skilled a player he's been, is still only 21.  That means upside.  That means he should... should get better.  D-men are much like goaltenders, they get better with age.  The prime for defense is right in the 28 to 34 range.  Even if he plays out the offer on the table, he will just be coming to that golden age.  Think about the greats like Lidstrom, Stevens, Langway, Bourque, Neidermayer, Chelios, these guys all played and played well late into their careers, into their 40s!  Experience is earned, not given.  Chara could not have led a team to a Stanley Cup 5 or 6 years ago and neither can Doughty.  He's just not there yet with the best defensemen in the league.  Analysts want to say he is because of his numbers, but there is no way, in my book, that Doughty is a Top 5 D-man in the NHL today. 

In order to consider this young star in the Top 5, who do you leave out?  I mean, you wanna argue Top 10, I'll listen, but otherwise your telling me that a relatively untested D on a team without any banners under his watch, is better than Chris Pronger, Shea Weber, Dion Phaneuf, Dan Boyle, Keith Yandle, Christian Ehrhoff, Mike Green, Chara, Duncan Keith, Kris Letang, Nicklas Lidstrom, Kiklas Kronwall, Brent Seabrook, Lubomir Visnovsky, P.K. Subban, Kevin Bieksa or his own teammate Jack Johnson?  Is my point made?  The NHL is littered with talented D, most of whom have more experience and more playoff success that Drew Doughty.  

It's simple math and the Kings are making a great offer to a young player and that player has a crappy agent telling him to holdout.  I would argue it is too much, but if they can afford it, and they're willing to bet on his continued potential, then Doughty is an idiot to let $200k, more than I've made in the last decade, a year get in the way of what could be a terrific season for an up and coming club.  Drew, ditch your agent and sign the bloody deal.

Shark Tank'd 

The other weird situation popping up this week is the case of my beloved (and aggravating) San Jose Sharks vs. Bad Boys Bail Bonds.  God, I hate those Bad Boy Club t-shirts.  Seriously, could that little rat faced no neck logo get any more annoying?  I actually saw a dude with that tattooed on his arm and he'd pose like the guy when you asked him about it!  But I digress.

What's happening in San Jose is Jeffrey Stanley, the owner of the bail bonds company, has a block of seats behind both benches at the Shark Tank and likes to have him and his guests wear his company's shirts to the games.  With TV coverage etc. this can be viewed as either shrewd or taking advantage of a situation.  He's getting a certain level of advertising from the placement of his shirts in the arena after all.  Now, the Sharks have issued a new policy that prohbits ticket holders from using their tickets to promote their business.  Stanley is pissed and consulting lawyers.

Honestly, I can see the reasoning behind the idea of the new policy.  It's about abuse.  I can guarantee that if some guy bought tickets behind home plate at Yankee stadium and wore the same shirt with his business logo on it every night, he would be talked too.  I think the issue here is the frequency and volume of the shirts.  If everyone in his group is wearing them 41 games a season, then clearly he is using the tickets as a means of advertising.  I doubt he would adhere to the same dress code if his seats were in the upper bowl.  But it is a slippery slope and it will come down to equal and clear enforcement.

Regardless of where you fall in the argument, the mistake the Sharks are making is in the delivery of the message.  The email in the article is hot and cold and seems to hint at making an example of Stanley, or at least singling him out.  Did all season ticket holders get this email?  I don't know, damn economy forced me to give up my seats three years ago... grumble.  But like my theoretical Yankees example above, I would imagine a personal phone call about their concerns would be more in line with keeping a season ticket holder happy and coming to a more responsible conclusion to the problem.

There is also an implication of "payback" because he cancelled his one year of advertising he purchased from the club last season.  One year of $70,000 for a penalty box ad.  Seriously?  Do you think an NHL franchise A) has a problem getting advertisers and B) gives a shit about losing $70k from a bail bonds company?  Not one bit.  It's also not a an issue of freedom of speech. FOS is about the ability to speak your mind without repercussion.  Stanley is speaking his mind about the situation, good.  It is not about the freedom to advertise which he may or may not be trying to do with his shirts.  Of course, we all know he is right?  The Sharks are just handling it all wrong.

That's about it for my first Hockey Humpday.  It's been great watching the preseason even if I did watch Owen Nolan's last shift in the NHL.  I'll miss ya Buster!!  One of my all time favs for sure.  I'll never forget witnessing that called shot in the All-Star game.  What a moment!  The good was seeing Evgeni Nabokov back on NHL ice, even if that Islanders jersey looked a little strange.  Enjoy your hockey week everyone, I'll be back next Wednesday to spout my unsolicited opinions!